As a coach, I’ve supported dozens of teams through moments of tension, learning, and change. I’ve seen how emotions influence collaboration, trust, and what teams are able to build together.
We often focus on tools and outcomes, but how we show up emotionally shapes the way we work, connect, and make progress together. Noticing those patterns is the first step toward changing them.
Whether we’re leading, collaborating, or navigating change, emotions are already in the room. They influence what gets said, what gets done and how we move forward.
Picture this: You’re in your team’s daily remote meeting. One person joins late, looking tired, responding briefly, maybe a little tensely. At first, you don’t think much of it. But then you notice others are speaking less too. Jokes are left unsaid. The atmosphere becomes cautious, even a bit tense. No one says anything out loud, but the emotional tone spreads. This is emotional contagion.
Emotions are not new in the workplace, but talking about them is. For a long time, we believed emotions belonged at home or at least out of sight. The best way to work is to be rational, efficient, and steady. Now we know better. Emotions are not a side story, they show up in every interaction. They shape how we listen, how we solve problems, how motivated we are, and how we come across to other people.
Emotions shape the atmosphere of a workplace. They influence how smoothly a team works together, how trust is built, and whether people share ideas or stay silent. Emotional skills are not side skills. They are part of our professional core when the work is done together.
How one mood shifts the whole space
Emotional contagion is part of how we’re wired for connection and cooperation – what makes us human and social. From an evolutionary point of view, it has helped us survive. Another person’s fear, excitement, or tension tells us something about the environment. Something we might need to respond to.
We often react before we realize it. Small gestures, expressions, or tone can shift how we feel. Suddenly, we feel restless, tense, or guarded. Emotional contagion doesn’t need grand gestures; all it takes is someone being genuinely joyful or tense. You see it in their face, hear it in their voice, and feel it in the rhythm of interaction. We constantly tune into one another, whether we intend to or not.
In a workshop I once facilitated, a participant started by saying, “This is my favorite kind of day, I get to be with people.” This statement shifted the whole room into a warm, energizing space. This wasn’t planned, but everyone felt it.
In one client meeting, our team was navigating tighter deadlines than expected. You could feel the unease in the room. Instead of jumping straight to the task list, one team member paused and asked, “Does it feel like today is one of those days where we just need to get through it?” People laughed and then opened up. One question was enough to unlock the room.
Researcher Sigal Barsade showed that even one cheerful or irritated person can shift an entire team’s mood and decision-making. This is not just about individual reaction, it’s a shared process that shapes team dynamics.
Emotional contagion often happens without words. We don’t need verbal expression to feel what others are feeling. Facial expressions, tone of voice, body language, and even breathing rhythms carry emotions that others begin to mirror. When one team member is enthusiastic, rushed, or tense, it quickly reflects in others. One person’s emotional state can shape the group’s atmosphere and performance. Often, without anyone noticing.
Behind it all is a network in the brain, particularly mirror neurons. These activate when we observe someone else doing or feeling something. It’s as if our own body is preparing to feel it too. These neurons allow us to experience empathy. We might feel joy, unease, or sadness simply by witnessing someone else’s experience. Empathy creates connection. We don’t just see someone’s emotion; we feel it, too. Compassion is what arises when that feeling moves us to act for another person.
Neuroscientist Lisa Feldman Barrett suggests emotions are not automatic reactions. Instead, our brains construct emotions based on past experiences, cultural understanding, and our interpretation of the situation. When we hear someone sigh or see a frustrated look, we don’t just react biologically. We assign it meaning, and that meaning shapes our own emotional state.
Emotional contagion is not just unconscious mirroring. It’s an active, partly unconscious process of interpreting and co-creating our emotional reality with others.
In teams, emotional rhythm becomes shared. Some people have a stronger emotional influence, sometimes without realizing it. One person brings nervous energy into the room. Another goes quiet, and the rest of the group retreats. A third names what’s already hanging in the air, and the group relaxes. Emotional contagion is not just about reacting. It’s emotional climate regulation. Something we do constantly, whether we’re aware of it or not.
Remote work doesn’t change this, it just shifts the channels. The tone of voice, pauses, and timing still say a lot. But microexpressions and body language are harder to notice, especially when we only see each other’s faces on screen. And sometimes, not even that, when cameras are off, even more is left to guesswork. A delayed reaction, lack of eye contact, or silence can feel unexpectedly strong. That’s why it can help to ask yourself after a video call: “What kind of emotional tone did I bring into the space?” “What did I sense in others?”
Why negative emotions spread faster (and how positivity helps)
Research shows that negative emotions often spread faster and more powerfully than positive ones. This doesn’t mean we are bad people or work in bad teams. It simply reflects the way our brains are wired to protect us. This is called the negativity bias, our tendency to react more strongly to threats and unpleasant signals than to positive ones. It's part of that same evolutionary mechanism that makes us attuned to emotions in the first place.
Social norms play a role, too. We’re often hesitant to say negative emotions out loud. So they show up in body language and tone. That makes them harder to name but not harder to feel. When no one says what’s going on, the mood still spreads.
Negative emotions like fear, shame, or irritation are often fast and reactive. Positive ones like gratitude or excitement tend to require more intentional sharing and receiving.
That’s why a single sigh, a cold glance, or a tense posture can shift a room before anyone has spoken. And also why it matters that someone notices. If tension goes unnamed, it starts to lead us. But one honest question or small observation can be enough to shift the tone.
Positive emotions spread, too, just more slowly. They often need to be expressed and noticed. Maybe that’s why they deserve even more space. Research in positive psychology suggests that one negative emotional moment may require three to five positive interactions to maintain a healthy emotional tone. One hurtful comment can’t be canceled out with a single smile.
This doesn’t mean we should avoid negative emotions, quite the opposite. But it does mean we shouldn’t hold back the positive. Appreciation, curiosity, and compassion aren’t fluff. They are the foundation of an emotionally healthy team climate.
Emotional intelligence is a skill
Emotional intelligence is the ability to recognize your own emotions, understand where they come from, name them, regulate your response, and consider others´ emotions too.
In consulting work, it often shows up in small, simple ways. For example, pausing before a meeting to ask yourself: “What kind of energy am I bringing into this?”
Or saying in a meeting: “Feels like there’s some tension in the air. Should we name it before jumping into the agenda?”
Sometimes, it shows up in silence. A daily meeting starts off low-energy. Someone asks: “Does it feel to anyone else like we’re a bit drained today?” That can open up an honest conversation about how the team is doing.
Trust doesn’t grow from tools or processes. It grows when we show up honestly with each other. When emotions are allowed, not hidden. That’s the foundation for building trust.
Emotional leadership is about small things
Emotional leadership means being aware of your impact on others. It’s noticing what you feel and what others might be feeling too. It’s the ability to pause when tension rises and continue in a way that supports connection instead of breaking it.
It’s not about control, it’s about presence, staying with discomfort when needed, and choosing action that helps. It requires awareness and a willingness to notice what’s happening in the room, not just in words but in everything in between.
Sometimes it’s asking: “How does this sound to you?” Or saying: “This feels heavy. Can I share why?”
Words like these make room for others to be human, too. They remind us that a workplace doesn't have to be a place where you´re always certain and ready. It can also be a place where you get to show up just as you are and still belong.
It all starts with a small pause
Emotions spread, often without us noticing. Sometimes we start reacting before we even realise we’ve been affected. That’s why one of the most important skills is the ability to pause, even for a moment.
We all have a moment before we react. That’s the space often described in a quote inspired by Viktor E. Frankl’s thinking in Man’s Search for Meaning (1946): “Between stimulus and response, there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom.”
That space is not just a neurological gap. It’s an opportunity to choose how to respond. How do I want to respond? What kind of energy do I bring into the room? How to support the person in front of me?
Even a short pause can shift the direction of a moment. Emotional leadership often begins right there, in choosing to respond with awareness rather than autopilot.
A simple way to practise this is to build in a small internal pause before reacting. A question like “What is happening in me right now?” can bring more space and awareness into the moment.
Another helpful question is, “This feeling I’m feeling – is it actually mine?” Emotions spread easily, sometimes so quietly we can’t tell what’s ours and what we’ve picked up from others. That question won’t solve everything, but it reconnects us with our own experience.
If we don’t name the emotion, it starts to name us. If we don’t stop to notice it, it begins to shape us without permission. Emotions are contagious, but so is awareness of them.
Emotional skills help us shape the emotional climate. Not just so that collaboration works, but so that it feels good too. The emotional climate doesn’t create itself. It’s shaped by our tone, our presence, and what we bring into the room.
Emotions spread, even when we don’t mean them to. Maybe that’s exactly why it’s worth pausing to ask: What kind of emotional tone do I leave behind?
